The Caption: A
Christmas Carole
Quiet lays over the chapel as the stout man sits at the
piano, pulls the bench an inch closer to the keyboard and waits for the even-stouter
star soloist who dramatically hesitates for thirty seconds before heavily
walking to her music stand as hot lights gleam on the pianists bald head
highlighting a pattern baldness which he used to hide with a comb-over but now
has shaved the remaining semi-circle of hair which emphasizes the nakedness but
not the gray stubble which is of no matter because the fifty people in the
audience are there to hear Christmas season songs of a nature not usually heard
(“See Amid The Snow,” “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel”) and the singer doesn’t have
to clear her throat, launching immediately into a festive, tinkling tune.
The pianist is intense, fingers precise, their movements
reflected in the backboard as his head bobs down toward the keys, then sideways
in actions belying his reverent appearance of a dark blue blazer and dark grey
slacks, playing with a competence that draws attention from his shiny head
while the singer, her performance costume being an above-the-knee maroon dress
that looks like a Hefty-bag smock and is partly covered by a tied-at-the-front
black cardigan…all while standing in black Soviet charwoman shoes, a look which
a necklace of dull gold-plate and indeterminate cabochon fails to revive, and
is not enhanced by a deep v-neckline but she does have long, mouse-brown hair that lays straight on her head and
past her ears until it comes to rest on her unample bosom, where a few curls
have been imposed and drift slightly when she moves her head for angelic
emphasis or nods to let the pianist know that she is ready to begin the next
song and he looks at her wishing not that he could sing like a neutered harem
slave but instead have her long hair and the mousey color be damned.
Brief
Bio: Gene McCormick is reputed to have once dated 18 female members of
the Morman Tabernacle Choir at the same time. There is likely little
truth to the repute.
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