Monday, September 22, 2014

Linda M. Crate- Three Poems

sister, i miss you

i miss the days
we were still friends and our
clothing was laughter
brighter than the stars,
and no one could
drag us back to reality no matter
how hard they tried
because we had our own
and i know as the time flows
people change and
sometimes friendships die—
even if you spend
the rest of eternity trying to forget me
i know i'll always remember
because you're as unforgettable
as the man that took my virginity
a girl that made me
comfortable in my own skin
whom i both envied and adored and loved
and love even still
regardless of the fact it's been years
since we've spoken;
and i miss you
when i think of all the adventures we had at college,
and how we were once thick as thieves
sisters connected
devoid only of that status by blood—
and i hope one day i can make you as proud
as you've always made me
in all your eloquence and beauty, all of
your charisma and charm
in all of your goodness and even in your flaws
because no matter what my heart
cannot stop loving you
i was made to love,
and you were just another friend i'd push away
without meaning to;
and i'm sorry.

lost flame

in shedding secrets you find truths,
and i find that no one will ever
have as big an impact on me
as you
i know you've moved on
and you probably perceive me a fool or jerk
or both for the misunderstanding we had
i cannot apologize enough
for hurting you,
but i also cannot forget you
the girl with her pink hair that was willing
to take me to her metal shop and show me what she was
working on;
to take the time to talk to me
just to show me what it was like for someone
to authentically care
without wanting anything in return
you were the first true friend i'd ever had—
i love you even still
because it's more than just an emotion
it's a reverberation deep in the soul
a friend to me is an always friend
even if they cannot or will not remember me,
and i miss your laughter
of hearing about your day of trying to encourage you
as much as you did me;
you were the one that taught me there was beauty
in my scars,
and that i was beautiful despite what those jerks said
that i wasn't fat, ugly, or stupid
now you're gone and the leaves blow and i remember
our autumn walks together and all those
visits to your apartment dorm,
and i miss you
like a phoenix yearns for another flame.

left behind

i know you probably don't remember me
was always the one with the better
and i would remind you of some adventures
we'd taken that you'd forgotten;
i miss you
more and more each day
because i feel like you were one of the few people
that truly understood me,
and i really appreciated your insights and wisdom
just taking the time to care
so few people had time for me—
but you never made me feel like a burden or a problem
you just accepted me flaws and all,
i wish we never had
that misunderstanding; that i had never pushed you away
it was foolishness for certain—
wanted to let you know that so much has changed
since you've been gone;
i've got my licence and i live in a city now
my first book is supposed to be published soon,
and i've sold a few pieces of my jewelry
i saw a few of your shoots and your successes on
your modeling page—
i'm sorry that i hurt you i'd give anything for a yesterday back
where we were cruising in your little pink car
hair blowing in the wind
not a care at all in the world because we were so damn sure—
i'm not so sure anymore,
but i do know
i'll never forget you.

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