Nicholas Jebsen- Three Poems

Into The Flood Again

 

I am sad. 

I am sad because I am utterly obsessed.

I am sad because it will never be

An internet quiz once called me 

clinically depressed

But I think I'm sad because the person I hate the most

also, coincidentally, is me.

I'm sad 

because all I can ever think about is scoring

I once used to laugh, because High School is a joke; but these day's it's just too

FUCKING! 

boring

And as I'm blinded by my faults, I'm force fed

Tegretol with a side of Amphetamine salts 

And although perhaps I can see once more, 

I can't help but feel like I'm under forty feet of water

Looking back up at the glistening surface 

as I rest against the ocean floor 

   

I wake each morning to a brand new day

Yet somehow it's all the same, bland, 

smothered under layer after layer of 

omnipresent gray.

They Say I Ruined Spring Formal

 

I  was stumbling, blinded by the shame of my own monstrosity 

Meandering like the river Styx

I hurled myself into the tangled mass of throbbing limbs

And I groped for an easy fix

I singled out a sullen wench

and molded against her swaying hips

And as the music's bombardment was briefly paused

we joined against our lips

Her gaping jaws soon eclipsed the entirety of my face, 

And I collapsed in horror, a broken soul, reverting 

to my rightful place.

I could tell by there stares that they hungered for my failure 

Like angst ridden jackals, deserted and unfed

So I destroyed the stereo, flicked on the lights 

And laughed to their gawking faces and said:

I tire, You fuckers, Of your punitive ways!

And I tire of your almighty plan!

I choose life! I choose love! I choose sex-positive abstinence!

I choose freedom, I choose being a man!

 

  

Rays

She's gone.

Only tears and our love remain, tears and love 

And her soul that is alleged to roam above

But I'm still right here, pen in one hand, 

The other clutching a cheap beer

I'm still right here, The reason why is 

Not currently clear...

I see her in a Facebook memorial page

And yet again in the rays of sun

I hear her laughter out of sight

As it echoes up the barrel of a loaded gun.