ELECTRIC BEACH
By da name you could imagine
supercharged eels
or stingrays in da currents
but it wuz nutting like dat.
Da beach wuz known as such
because of da nearby power plant
at Kahe Point.
Two giant cooling pipes offshore
outflowed clean warm watah
so all da surrounding marine life
wuz attracted to check it out.
Dats why da place
wuz so popular wit snorkelers
and scuba divers.
Reggie wuz familiar
wit Electric Beach too
but he didn’t have
any fish on his mind
wen he sat at dat bar
in nearby Ko Olina.
He wuz moa interested
in da tourist chick
dat wuz looking back at him.
Dere wuz wun mutual tingle
on da brainwaves
and at first Reggie’s plan
wuz foa the two of dem
to drive dat night
back to his apartment in Waianae
but suddenly dey stopped
at Electric Beach instead
and disappeared into da dark.
Needless to say
dey lit it up on wun towel
and wuz headed
to wun explosive surge
wen wun synthetic sun
blazed on dere startled eyeballs.
Behind wun flashlight
wun voice like God
in da Garden of Eden
spoke and revealed
two okoles gleaming in da glare.
Da cop
wen cut dem wun break
right deah on Electric Beach
wen he told dem to leave
and go get wun room—
lucky foa dem
dey won't have to pay
wun utility bill
foa misusing da premises.
Glossary
okole Rear end; buttocks.
Joe Balaz writes in Hawaiian Islands Pidgin (Hawai'i Creole English) and American-English. He edited Ho'omanoa: An Anthology of Contemporary Hawaiian Literature. He presently lives in Ohio.
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