The Ten Exceptions
1) "I am the Lord your God you shall not have strange Gods before me" (Ex 20:2-6, Deut 5:6-10)
--except for power and money, of course, and as much pomp as you can afford.
2) "You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain" (Ex 20:7-8, Deut 5:11-12)
--unless you happen to stub your toe; lose money in the stock market or pop a zit before a big date.
3) "Remember to keep holy the Lord's Day" (Ex 20:8-11, Deut 5:12-15)
--unless it happens the weather that day is great for golf or a long drive in what’s left of the country.
4) "Honor your father and your mother" (Ex 20:12, Deut 5:16)
--unless the old coots are eating your inheritance by living so long.
5) "You shall not kill" (Ex 20:13, Deut 5:17)
--unless due to an accident you have to go to Planned Parenthood.
6) "You shall not commit adultery" (Ex 20:14, Deut 5:18)
--unless both of you are unhappily married and your spouses are seeing other people as well.
7) "You shall not steal" (Ex 20:15, Deut 5:19)
--except from your employees who aren’t being paid a living wage.
8) "You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor" (Ex 20:16, Deut 5:20)
--unless you don’t like the guy next door and wonder if his kids have ringworm.
9) "You shall not covet your neighbor's wife" (Ex 20:17, Deut 5:21)
--unless she takes the sun for hours in half a bikini in her back yard.
10) "You shall not covet your neighbor's goods" (Ex 20:17, Deut 5:21)
--unless the couple across the street bought a Lamborghini and a vacation home in the Bahamas.
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Donal Mahoney lives in St. Louis, Missouri.
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