Vocabulary Test
"Twit or twerp,
that is the question,"
said the turtle
very worried
to another turtle
checking his iPad
in the student center.
"You're either
a twit or twerp.
Which is it?
That is the question.
I have to know.
There's a vocabulary
test tomorrow."
The other turtle said,
"I'm a twerp, I guess,
because I'm a male.
Only a male can be a twerp.
It takes a female to be a twit."
The turtle
very worried
checked his iPhone,
paused and said,
"I met a twit the other day.
She had a buxom shell
and legs to crawl for.
We had breakfast together
on the football field,
dandelions au dew.
It looked like a great date
till I met her roommate.
Turned out to be a snapper.
What a ditz!"
Grandparents in a Zeppelin
We retired on the same day,
several years ago, my wife and I.
We sat around the house
drinking espresso coffee
and playing canasta till
my wife began to grouse.
We sold the house, bought an RV
and drove around the country
visiting, one by one, our five kids,
all married and in different states.
Were our grandkids doing well?
Were they getting the best?
After we had spent a few weeks
in their driveways in our RV,
the kids would politely suggest
maybe we should go back home.
Trouble is, we'd sold our house.
All we had was the RV.
Again my wife began to grouse
and so we sold the RV
and bought a zeppelin.
Now we float from state to state
over the driveways of our kids
and watch our grandkids
dashing home from school
wearing backpacks like the soldiers
landing on the beach in World War II.
The little darlings are geniuses,
I tell you, light years smarter than
our brilliant kids.
Donal Mahoney
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Donal Mahoney lives in St. Louis, Missouri.
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