The Flatline Cocktail
Glucose 5% and Vodka 50/50
"That was an experience
I'm in no hurry to relive.
Imagine lying in
Intensive,
tubes and IV's everywhere,
drugged almost out of your
mind, virtually helpless
with nothing much to do
but
watch the Vital Signs
monitor
and listen to the
neighboring
death rattles. So when the
machine goes from stable to
flat line, I'm really
shocked.
It was just like you see
it
on all those bad TV movies
but, at least, I'm pretty
sure I'm alive. Still,
the machine thinks I'm
dead
but not to worry, someone
is monitoring these
machines,
like all the time, right?
After a few minutes of
this,
I'm getting a little
desperate,
leaning on the button
hard.
By the time the nurse
finally
comes running, I'm
sweating
bullets, 'What seems to be
the problem?' she says. Remember,
I can't talk, so I'm pushing my
eyes
over indicating the
machine
that insists I'm dead.
She's so cool, when she
catches
on, after all, it's not her
in
the bed is it? Says glib as
hell,
'Well, we'll just have to
look
into this won't we?'
I'm think, you bet your sweet
ass,
you will, sweetheart.
Well, it turns out, the machine
had
a simple malfunction, you
know
like, shit happens. You'd think
with all they're charging to
keep
you alive, the least they could
do
was give you a machine that
works.
Well, I guess it could have
been
worse, I could have been in the
hospital
where they took the wrong
guy
off life support."
The Kiss of Death Cocktail
A Pitcher of Budweiser and an ounce
of Shalimar
Pressed up against
the outer wall of the bar,
skirt hiked up almost
to her waist, she is
shameless, French kissing
him breathless, all
pretense
of a quiet after work
date for a drink as
forgotten as the
discussion
of his wife who no longer
cares what he does;
she's more interested
in her exercise class
than sex. Or the daughter
he still loves but only
sees in between activities
and dates. All is forgotten
as the half-filled
pitcher and beer glasses
on the bar, cigarettes
burned to the filter,
an uneaten double order
of extra hot as passion
chicken wings. Each week,
after week as the semester
ends, we see them as
just another Kama Sutra
couple, she the black eyed
widow, kissing, probing
deeply with her tongue,
he the anointed, gradually
shedding outer layers,
first, the wedding ring,
then the suit jacket, tie
and pressed shirt,
finally,
the bright luster of his
eyes.
The Icy
Hand of Death Cocktail
One third
Green Chartreuse, One third Yellow
Chartreuse, One third Pernod
The
Expense Account didn't
necessarily exclude strange
experiments with after dinner
drinks
but I wondered
as I
watched him slamming
pony
glass after pony glass
of high
octane liquid sugar death
how he
was going to justify
a hotel
expenses bill
larger
than the National Debt
of a
former world power.
What
happened to their GNP
bled the
country white attempting
to fill a
bottomless void
like the
one in his memory
of that
night that ended with
a pony
that kicked back and
the icy
hand of death carried
him over
onto his back
where he
lay on the wash
and wear
carpeting staring up
at the
hovering indistinct faces,
with
blank, unseeing eyes.
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